Character Profiles

Ellie Mae McDog

Ellie Mae is Lube's long-lost sister, and the daughter of HoundDog McDog and PussyCat Catfield. When she has her hair in her face like the picture above, she seems quite a looker. But underneath that hair is a big, ugly, Lube-like nose with warts, and a set of rotting teeth that could make a dentist cry (or weep tears of joy, depending on how you look at it). Cat almost married this girl by mistake when he and Dog arrived in Yokelburg-- he swigged some moonshine made from catnip, offered to him by one of the locals, and accidentally burped in Ellie Mae's face. Ellie Mae coyly burped back at him. HoundDog later sought out Cat and asked him, "Did you burp in my little girl's face?" Just when Cat thought he was in trouble, PussyCat explained, "In these here parts, darlin', when you burp in someone's face, it's a marriage proposal!" And apparently, Ellie Mae had accepted!

Now Cat was not in trouble-- he was in big trouble. Not only does the idea of marriage make him sick, but the idea of being married to a hag like Ellie Mae was even worse. Worser yet, Dog was happy for his brother and couldn't imagine why Cat wouldn't want to get married, so Cat's was entirely on his own. The wedding was almost called off when everyone realized they had no rings... but then guess who shows up?

That's right: Winslow! And he's got lots of rings to go around! This was the last straw, and Cat became so enraged and frantic that he yells he won't marry some dog. Naturally, this starts an argument between him and Dog, and HoundDog and PussyCat join in to defend each of the brothers. Before anyone knows what's happening, the Yokelburg feud has started up all over again after 50 years!

It is unknown how Lube feels about his sister.. in fact, Lube may not even realize he has a sister. Lube and Ellie might even have another sibling, the mother or father of Lube's nephew, Bartholomew. It's highly improbable that Ellie Mae is Barty's mother-- she seems a bit on the young side to me, and how could Barty go to school in Nearburg if she lives in Yokelburg? Nearburg School isn't a boarding school, and even if it were, I doubt that Ellie Mae would have the money to send her own child away to one; it's best to assume that Ellie Mae is Bartholomew's aunt.

All in all, Ellie Mae seems like a nice gal, but I wouldn't doubt that she's almost as stupid as Lube, and just as ignorant about how ugly she looks. Poor Ellie... she'd be the talk of the town if she got a nose job and some extreme orthodontics.


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